Conditionally we live part III
One of the most important lessons and learnings that I have had recently about unconditional love is that it does not amount to sacrifice for others. As compassionate individuals we may at times feel that we need to give up on our own visions, aspirations and needs to feed another’s. Please be mindful that I am talking of your needs and not your greed - I am speaking of things which are crucial for your own existence and not things that can be postponed and are not urgent and immediate.
Possibly the only exception could be dependent children as they are your responsibilities, you are the vehicle that brought them into this world, and you owe them the right pedestal to catapult them into this world. Contrary to popular belief, this may or may not be age-bound and dependent on environment too. Whether the child is 18 years or 21 years, we no longer live in an environment where sheer hard work is enough, external support and networking is critical too, so casting a child out of the nest basis age alone, is not enough.
While sacrifice may feel noble, feel like unconditional love it also reeks of lack of self-love i.e. you are going hungry while trying to feed another’s stomach. Philanthropists, wealth creators and the abundant can meet the requirements of the less fortunate, however, when lacking in wealth and love, helping others unduly signals to the Universe that you have enough. By all means, keep your own needs simple and basic so you can help others and have an abundant mindset, not a stingy one. Dream big by all means but keep a balanced purse.
Simply speaking let us again look at nature, when a flower or a tree blooms, it does not dry and shrivel up to make way for other plants or trees. While they grow to their own abundance, they also shade, are fragrant and bountiful to those that seek them. Only when you love yourself, allow yourself to prosper and grow to your own potential can you help others reach the same. Unconditional love is demonstrated when you empower, help, empathize and provide for and do the same for yourself too.
Conditional love is when sharing happens with strings attached or making others feel obliged to you or not giving, helping when you are in a position to do so. Do not squash another’s dreams because it does not fall into your boundaries or sensibilities of what is correct for another, that is conditional love.
Nature gives opportunities equally to all — by casting seeds that are a true representation of themselves, flowers are allowing others to bloom as well as them, not a lower version of themselves, and are carried far and wide to possibly the best place for their growth. To that extent, nature gives others an even better chance to grow
When Universe gives us what we want and need, it is responding to your prayers, your hard work and your faith. There is nothing that stops others to do the same. If people feel entitled, burden themselves needlessly and expect to be rescued constantly, then they are seeking sacrifices and not unconditional love from you.
Do not be a savior if you are not in a position to do so, yet you can express your unconditional love through other ways — give others opportunities, empowering and supportive ideas, empathy and solutions for their dreams and most importantly emotional support. Be gentle, be kind but also allow them the freedom to rescue themselves and not force your own methods of rescue as that may trap them further. Balancing your needs with those of others is unconditional love.
